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Ebola at Columbia

October 24, 2014

Apologies, this post only has one zombie but since I’ve started the zombie ebola conversation I may as well continue following-through on the ebola story. Nearly two years ago to the day, New York was blacked out and struggling with Superstorm Sandy, today we welcome Ebola to the city.

Columbia Spectator: “CUMC doctor hospitalized with ebola-like symptoms, reports say” by Christian Zhang and Emma Bogler:

According to the New York Daily News, the patient was 33-year-old Craig A. Spencer, a professor with the Columbia University Medical Center’s department of medicine. Spencer had returned just 10 days earlier from a Doctor’s Without Borders trip to Guinea where he treated Ebola patients, the Daily News reported.

Woo Columbia zombies! Way to score the public health brand marketing opportunity.

CNN now reporting he tests positive: “NY doctor recently back from West Africa tests positive for Ebola, officials confirm” by Ray Sanchez and Shimon Prokupecz:

New York Mayor Bill de Blasio said, “We want to state at the outset there is no reason for New Yorkers to be alarmed.”

Just two weeks ago a Columbia researcher was quoted in NYMag: “How to Prevent Ebola Panic in the Facebook Age” by Jesse Singal:

“Ebola’s the kind of disease that zombie movies are made out of,” said Abdulrahman El-Sayed, a researcher at Columbia’s Mailman School of Public Health. “It’s the kind of thing where if you’re not close to the science and don’t understand the epidemiology of it, it’s a very scary-sounding disease — you bleed all over the place, it kills more than 50 percent of the individuals who contract it, it’s spreading like wildfire in West Africa.”

That’s pretty similar to what Rep. Farenthold said, that was quoted by Meet the Press, and that Senator Casey called irresponsible rhetoric. And recall yesterday’s post “ebola is a metaphor for zombie” and ebola as a symbol of the threat of globalism.

We are left to debate of whether the best solutions are to solve with individual self-reliance or paternal institutions. These are the kinds of great debates that the young men of Columbia College used to have while reading their core curriculum of mostly Dead White European Male texts.

Meanwhile in today’s Columbia Spectator: “Free screening of Ghostbusters tonight” by Hannah Josi:

Rumor has it that the money earned from the shots on campus still pays for all the lawn maintenance. Given how much the administration loves grass, that’s a lot of money. Thanks, Ghostbusters!

Yeah, thanks zombie Bill Murray, thanks for paying for the grass. We smoked that core curriculum into a po-mo hash of multicultural nonexistence, and the grass is all that’s left of Columbia. Like the other great institutions, it is crumbling.

In another Columbia Spectator article last month, “Dumb as Mudd” by Alex Della Santina:

What does this say about engineering at Columbia? We come to an institution to learn the art of innovation, efficiency, improvement. But we have to do that in a building that exemplifies all of the “don’ts” of engineering.

Like other zombie brands, the elite colleges have become hollowed shells, preserving their landscaping, the facade, but not the educational rigor. Columbia is an arm of the media establishment, an unregistered political lobbying institution, a tax-free hedge fund, and a facilitator of indentured servitude. It is immoral to allow 18 year olds to take out debt to pay for this kind of elite white man’s drug. This kind of liberal arts education is the most expensive addiction in America and it is fueled by viral media that reinforces the illusory prestige.

But at least the grass is nice; with that dank smell of old classrooms like Havemeyor 309. In the recent PBS profile (propaganda): “Treasures of New York: Columbia University“, PrezBo says:

you walk through the gates at 116th street and you immediately feel your IQ go up 10 points

That’s cause the elitism virus is airborne.

See more zombie Columbia or zombie New York or zombie education or, if we must, zombie Ebola

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From → Academics

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