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Zombie Sketch Comedy Finance

April 5, 2014

Slate: “Hey, Saturday Night Live: I’m a Black Woman. Why Did You Turn Me into a Man?” by Raychelle Burks.

Ms. Burks is the chemistry postdoc in Nebraska who recently popularized the zombie perfume, referred to last week here at ZombieLaw in post: “The aroma of creativity in a world of testing

Burks writes:

Last week, the American Chemical Society’s Reactions podcast released a video called “Zombie Apocalypse Survival Chemistry,” which featured yours truly … this video got a bit of media attention. Even the folks at Saturday Night Live noticed,

But the folks at zombie SNL mucked up their fact-checking. Burks is a self-proclaimed magical unicorn;

“Magical unicorn,” you say? I am a black female chemistry Ph.D

SNL called her a “grad student”, worse referred to her as “he”, then doubling down on this gender bias, the SNL joke refers to her boss-scientist as a male too. In fact, she’s also a she. Finally, SNL implies it’s a real perfume, it’s not, it’s just a thought-experiment. So for anyone who gets their news from SNL’s Weekend Update, beware.

When I was a kid I used to think Weekend Update was the best form of weekly news. Then Daily Show was invented.

Speaking of Daily Show, see The Wire: “Jon Stewart Lays into CNN’s Flight 370 Coverage: “Pointing at S–t and Wondering What It Is”” by Ben Cosman:

“It’s been three weeks since the disappearance of Malaysia Flight 370 … In these three weeks CNN has been, much like our Native American ancestors, using every part of the tragedy,” Stewart said. What does using “every part of the tragedy” mean exactly? Well for CNN, it would include such stellar news coverage as hypothesizing about a “zombie plane”: As Stewart said, CNN is just one step away from telling viewers how the plane met your mother.

Good cross promotion for the last episode of that long zombie sitcom. Recall HIMYM zombies.

Recall also the prior ZombieLaw post about CNN’s Zombie Plane theory. And see NyTimes: “Story of the Century” by Roger Cohen mocking the news networks coverage of important news between constant updates of no new information about the missing plane. And I personally watched a moment exactly like this on MSNBC too. Krystal Ball was so excited about another update on the nothing.

Of course, for Hegel, the nothing is something, and the media obsession with the missing plane is notable for what was ignored during the time. “Ukraine zombie – what this means?. We don’t know. So we could conjecture about that or let’s conjecture about this missing object. Let’s remember the world is big, and not obsess about politics on the other side. Worse, we ignore stories in our own country just as well.

Meanwhile, also in Nebraska, recall last year UNL Chancellor Harvey Perlman, had a zombie video on his popular PERL’s of knowledge video marketing for the university. Recently with special guest star Warren Buffett in a clip designed to go viral, with direct mentions of twitter and kittens.

No mention of zombies, so why do I mention it? Well, first zombies are all about the cult of personality (consider Kardashian zombies), and Buffett is a great example. Second, zombies like to mix metaphors of health and finance, and Buffett successfully sold the world on TARP by calling the CDO-crisis a “heart attack” repeatedly on national television. The Oracle explained it in simple terms and the people bought it for a time.

Still, none of this is enough to warrant reference, but the Associated Press covered the story (here and here) and just like I did, they referenced the prior PERL of knowledge video about UNL and the zombie apocalypse. So now, searching Associated Press articles, we can find an increased correlation in the co-occurrence of the words “zombie” and “Warren Buffett”. Does that matter? Maybe for a search engine, and maybe for a language acquisition algorithm? Like the human brain?

Language is a virus and the absurdist art that is PERLs of knowledge, is amazing. It makes me almost wish I was in Nebraska. I think maybe I will go to Warren Buffett’s shareholder convention next month. I bet it’s hilarious comedy. And by the way, “Warren Buffett” also appears in my book “Cocker Spaniel in the Federal Courts” because he is quoted by Judge Robert Sweet in Strougo v. Bea Associates, 188 F. Supp. 2d 373 (S.D.N.Y., Feb. 21, 2002):

management companies were looking for Cocker Spaniels and not Dobermans. I’d say they found a lot of Cocker Spaniels out there.

In conclusion: “Private equity, an infection that is eating the world” by Cory Doctorow:

Bain Capital bought and gutted Guitar Center, turning it into a financially complex, debt-riddled zombie that exists to float high-risk junk bonds to fill out the portfolios of the hyper-rich, without any connection to the real world of guitars, amplifiers and musicians.

Is that what Mitt Romney wanted to do the America? Would that be any different than it is now? And is this also what’s happened to Saturday Night Live, and the Daily Show? Is private equity controlling everything this way? Doctorow quoting Eric Garland, “How to get beyond the parasite economy,“:

Nobody making decisions will lose their family fortune if it goes badly, and everybody in management stands to make substantial fees, bonuses and salaries. … it is just one more imperial outpost for the spare financial capital of the top 0.1% of the population … risk is a tool for cash flow, not a concern for survival.

And that’s what makes it funny; laughter is sometimes a cure for zombies.

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