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How Long Can You Zombie

March 20, 2013

The classic joke is “I thought you’d be taller” but I often misquote it as “I thought you were dead” – Either way, zombies — sometimes fast, sometimes very very slow – just keep coming.

Michael Cieply at NYTimes writes (with three different titles depending on when I read it)“A Risk for Films That Move at a Zombie’s Pace” , “In Hollywood, Zombies Take Their Time”, “Zombie and Other Genre Films Often Require Years to Make”:

“World War Z,” when it finally hits the big screen on June 21, will be chasing a wave Mr. Brooks helped to start.

Things take time. And yet, in this fast moving world it is so easy to think that if you aren’t light-speed you are falling backwards.

In the Wall Street Journal “‘Zombie’ Startups Look for Ways to Come to Life ” by Evelyn M. Rusli picks up on the notion of “zombie startups” attributed to Danielle Morelli but I think they mean Danielle Morrill of Referly – which ZombieLaw recently mentioned in a zombie news post.

Related at Forbes: “Zombie Startups Definition: You Need To Pivot Or Close” by Liz Kammel responding to Morrill’s “zombie startups”:

what is this Zombie she speaks of? I believe it’s a moment in time that many entrepreneurs have … what I believe is different about this “zombie” state is that you can come back to life. Zombies make me think that’s the end and there’s no hope.

How long do you have to hold out before you are no longer a zombie and just a struggling business like everybody else? Unless maybe there is so much venture capital out there that people are willing to buy zombie nothings?

Meanwhile at Bloomberg: Spanish Banks Cut Developers as Zombies Dying: Mortgages by Sharon Smyth & Rob Urban:

More than half of the country’s 67,000 developers can be categorized as “zombies,” with liabilities that exceed their assets

And again Bloomberg: “Deauville Zombie Strikes as Cyprus Tax Inflames Crisis” by James G. Neuger about European tensions == Meanwhile at SeekingAlpha: ” Germany Choking On Zombie Bailout Economics ” by Russ Winter — Which explains why the season finale of Girls had Jessa absent and Marnie primed to be smothered next season (but does not explain why HBO’s Englightened was cancelled – apparently the world only likes #anonymous before they get caught).

So how long can you hold out?

NorthernStar: “ Zombie games have lasting playability “by Patrick Pastrana — but we aren’t video games.

So at AmmoLand, Major Van Harl USAF Ret “Which is Worse Zombies Or Lack Of Medication suggests having at least three months of your medication in stock in case of zombies – which is just good advice in case of most other disasters or other emergencies too – though 3 months is probably not long enough for a real zombie crisis.

In other prepper news, TheFastLaneCar’s Nathan Adlen corrects himself – he originally thought the Ram Power Wagon would be best for the zombie apocalypse but now he’s remembered the Mercedes-Benz G 63 AMG 6×6

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Though I’d prefer he buy American, the Mercedes is a nice set of wheels. But hopefully these trucks are not your every day vehicle. We are the zombies done killed our planet. Every time we startup (the trucks or the business ventures) we start to cause disturbances. Idling can be bad (#IdleNoMore) but sometimes it is a necessary to let the engine run to keep the car warm in winter.

Some are idling for no reason, but some just need some help – See Hope at the Telegraph: “Budget 2013: Hundreds of thousands of people to be rescued from ‘zombie mortgages’ Hundreds of thousands of people are to be rescued from so-called “zombie mortgages” and helped to move house with state-backed loans.” by Christopher Hope

While bankers at HSBC respond screaming “Help! 1970s-style business zombies are back: Putting lower unemployment ahead of higher productivity risks long-term economic damage” by Stephen King (regarding downsides of quantitative easing and demand management policies).

But of course, “risks long-term” – Keynes famous aphorism: in the long run we are all dead. Still accountants and actuarials can never predict exactly how my corporation will dissolve. We don’t really know how carbon emissions cause global climate change. We know that we will die, but we are pretty much zombie walking dead about everything else. Another aphorism – Benjamin Franklin: Death and Taxes

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